The Role of Maid (or Matron) of Honour

She's your favourite lady or your favourite man...so your maid/matron/man of honour should know what you'll need and when.

It's a fantastic honour you bestow on the person who will stand next to you when you get married. But she (or he) isn't there just to look pretty and hold your flowers when you put the ring on his finger - you should choose someone you can rely on to help you with the before, during and after wedding duties!

Here is a list of common maid/matron/man of honour duties...but it's up to you how much responsibility you distribute. At the end of the day, your maid of honour should be the most dependable, rational, level-headed sounding board you know! 

BEFORE
*    Go with the bride to any wedding shows or fairs
*    Help "scout" potential wedding venues (ceremony and reception) and organise logistical details (date, time, dress attire)
*    Help bride choose or make and address invitations (Not the most exciting job, but trust me, you'll want all the help you can get on this one!)
*    If the couple requests it, collect RSVPs
*    Help choose favours and help coordinate this with your theme
*    Help the bride sort out the seating chart/arrangements
*    Plan the bridal shower (This isn't really a New Zealand tradition, but if you're keen for one, let her/him know they better get planning!)
*    Plan the hens' night, with the help of the other bridesmaids
*    Coordinate setup with the bridesmaids or assist the wedding planner when required, either the night before or the day of the wedding
*    Help look for wedding gowns with the bride and attend dress fittings where relevant (remember - the maid of honour should always have a spare pair of heels in the bride's size and a HUGE bottle of water when trying on dresses...)
*    Is honest with the bride about which dresses suit and which do not!
*    Help the bride choose the bridesmaids dresses - after all, she has to wear it, so she should certainly like it!
*    Help the bride pack for the honeymoon
*    Attend the rehearsal

ON THE DAY
*    Make sure the bride eats and drinks enough water while getting ready
*    Act as the "messenger", should the bride want to communicate with the groom or family before the ceremony
*    Check on the venues (both ceremony and reception) to make sure everything is good to go
*    Help the bride get into her dress
*    Help her with her jewellery, veil or headpiece and any other accessories
*    Have the "Emergency Kit" on hand throughout the day and easily accessible during the wedding ceremony and reception (See "The Emergency Wedding Kit" tip for details of what this should contain)
*    Make sure the bride is calm, cool and collected...

DURING
*    Always ensure her train is right
*    Stash some tissues or a handkerchief for the bride to easily grab during the ceremony
*    Hold her bouquet when her hands need to be free
*    Sign the register as the bride's witness
*    Keep on hand, or make sure a bridesmaid has on hand, any touch up makeup and lipstick/lip gloss - and let her know when to reapply
*    "Fluff" her dress whenever required
*    As gross as this may sound, it happens...help her in the toilet if she's got a big dress!
*    Make a speech at the reception
*    Dance with the best man when the band/MC calls everyone else onto the dance floor after the first dance
*    Make sure they are all set at the end of the night

AFTER
*    Collect the gifts that were brought to the venue
*    Clean up anything at the venue, if this has not already been taken care of
*    Keep the guestbook safe
*    Make a list, with the bride, of all the gifts received and who gifted them
*    Take the wedding gown to the cleaners, if the bride and groom have already left for their honeymoon